Oprah Loves the Blue Ball

If there is one thing that I know, it is that Oprah loves the blue ball game. What is Blue Ball you ask? Well let me tell you that it is a game that should not be taken lightly or a game that involves a piece of pumpkin cheese and sangria for breakfast.

Blue Ball is a game the combines some of the rules from football and rugby. There are way too many rules to write on this mainly because certain rules only apply for certain plays/situations and also for the fact that I still don't know all of the rules anyway.

This year, we got to play on an indoor soccer practice field because one of our friends works at a local high school and he borrowed the keys for the weekend.

The first 9 minutes of the game was great, both teams only scored once and we knew each others strategies. But when the 10Th minute occurred, I was done with. Like I said before, it is not the brightest ideal to eat a piece of cheesecake for breakfast before and extremely enduranced fill sport with hardly any time to take a break.

I will cut the long story short, I threw up all over the place. I wasn't my best moment, but at least I gave it my all.

After my quick personal time out, I went back to the field to join my two teammates to dominate the hell out of the field to barely win the game. I think what killed me that most was the constant running and being required to do anything that was remotely athletic. It is just hard to prepare for the game because we are either training for our strongman competitions, playing video games, or at a bar talking about strongman competitions and video games. I am more than certain that the latter is the correct answer.

Katie tends to record all of the games, so it was nice to see a group of out of shape guys try to play a game and get winded within the first 8 minutes of game play.

After the game, everyone got ready to go Pete and Jess' house for the annual Saturday after Thanksgiving party. It is always a potluck dinner where everyone brings a dish and whatever type of beverage that they want to share with everyone. There is usually a wide array of food at this event. Some body may bring tamales while another person while bring some from chicken express while another may bring hamburger buns and cookies. Even though the food types may not match, everything usually gets eaten very quickly.

The rest of the night is usually spent by the girls talking and the guys playing 42. When those games are over, everyone gets together and play a game as a group.

This year, the party ended a little earlier than usually because Pete and Jess now have a daughter named Juliette. So we moved the after party to JMill and Jenn's house.

As we made that 1 minute drive down the street, people started to either get their second wind or become very tired. I was one of the guys to decided to act like a 4 year old and call it a night. It was good day, but blue ball just wore the hell out of me. I am pretty sure that if we played that game once a month instead of once a year, we would be in tremendous shape.

James Bond Party and the Cleggs

The Wednesday before every Thanksgiving, some friends of mine have a yearly tradition. Have a James Bond Themed Party and get crazy. This party has been going on for some time now and it never seems to disappoint.

The party had all of the ingredients for people in their twenties to have a great time. And those ingredients included obnoxiously loud music, beer pong, an assortment of beverages, and a dance floor that will just appear out of nowhere.

People are encouraged to dress up like their favorite character from any of the Bond movies but usually about half of the crowd does it. I painted myself in gold one year but some drunk guy thought I was just a big Academy Award.

Some friends and I went to the party but could only stay for a couple of hours because we were pre-gaming pretty hard with some people we haven't seen since high school and lost track of time while "reliving" the old days. By "reliving" the old days, I really mean we were just making fun of each other the whole time while sharing a beer or 12.

If you want to come next year, just call Danny. I just realized that I left his number up on the flyer. So give him a call and make your reservations for next year.

I am now going to jump to the Friday after Thanksgiving since not a lot happened that day but it involved the same people from the party.

Every year, the Clegg Brothers have a "Friends and Family" Thanksgiving Dinner at their house. It is just a time where all of their friends get together and hang out with their folks for a little bit. The night always ends up the same. We will make some very inappropriate jokes about Alyssa to her face, I end up drinking too much wine, The Clegg Brothers will relentlessly make fun of each other, and their parents will just look in disbelief will making ashamed/humorous faces at everyone.

I am not going to lie, I always look forward this event every year because it is an extremely cool and relaxing way to spend an evening. By the end of the night, we usually go through at least 4 bottles of wine and several types of deserts.

Thanksgiving 09

Usually, my family likes to get together and cook for our Thanksgiving Feast, but this year we wanted to shake things up a bit.

My mom, dad, and I decided not to cook and just go out to eat for dinner instead. We got into the car and traveled the long 20 minute journey to "The Keg Steakhouse" for their Thanksgiving Special. The special itself was basically a steal and a person would have to be damn near retarded not to get it.

The restaurant was packed with people who had the same idea as us. The Keg Thanksgiving special was a three course meal for only 20 bucks a person. Who ever ordered the meal would get a ginormous caesar salad as an appetizer, white and dark meat turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, mushrooms, tons of vegetables, gravy, and some cranberries for the main course, and for dessert, a piece of pumpkin cheese cake of course. To add to the mix, the three of us also thought that it would a grand ideal to have a couple of mixed drinks as well. And to let you know, it was a damn good ideal my friends.

After a couple hours of feasting on our delicious food, it was time to pay the check and go home. When we got back home and changed into our elastic pants, it was time for a couple of more drinks and slowly slip into a turkey coma for a couple of hours. The amount of food that was left over from the restaurant would definitely hold us over for a couple of days without any worry at all.

After I awoke from my slumber and discovered 3 missed calls and 9 text messages, it was time to get ready and go to 12th First Annual "Paul and Katie Started a Fire and Have Too Much Booze to Finish By Themselves" Party. This is the first year that they have done this, but for some reason, it does sound more fun if you put some random number in front of it. It tends to attract more people to come because they will think that they have been left out of all of the previous parties.

At Paul and Katie's, I couldn't believe how much firewood some one would go through in during a 3 hour period. Paul had gotten some firewood from some Paul Bunyan type of relative that he has in Ennis. It probably would have been better if we would used only large logs instead on small ones, but it still got the job done.

After a case of beer, some Crown Royal, and the first "Vacation" movie done with, it was time to call it a night and head home with the knowledge that every meal for the next couple of days would contain some sort of turkey product. I predict that will be sick of turkey by Saturday afternoon. Any takers?

Beta Formal and The Accidental Wedding Crasher

A few weeks ago, my Fraternity held its annual Formal (basically, a college version of prom where drinking is allowed and encourage by legal means only) at the Hilton in Downtown Fort Worth. It was a good turnout with Betas from different eras. The only bad thing about the event was that there was a cash bar and this is when the accidental wedding crasher comes in the play.


When I was coming in to the Hilton, there were several wedding events that were occurring at the same time which usually means one thing: open bar.

Once I discovered this gem, I took full advantage of it. But just to let you know, I did accidentally stumble across this precious find.

When I arrived at the hotel for my formal, I had no clue which room it was actually being held in. I called some friends and they said that it was up the stairs and to the right. I followed those directions to the T and saw a group of people hanging out with everyone.

I thought this was my group because the formal is the one event where all Betas, whether you are an alumni or still in school, can go to. So as I am walking around introducing myself to people thinking that they are just the old people in the frat and drinking their free beer, I soon discovered that this is not my banquet at all. It was actually a wedding reception for Sara and John. I confirmed this when a member from the wedding asked us to sign the wedding portrait as we walked in to the dinning area.

I, of course, freaked out about this because I did not want people to think that I was some dickhead crashing a wedding to get some booze and ass. I quickly asked for where the restroom was so I could have a reason of getting out of there and find where I was actually supposed to be, but I only did this after signing the wedding photo with a fake name.

After finding my group, which was the floor directly above where the wedding reception was, I told them what happened. They laughed and they thought it would a great idea for some of them to go down there like they were in the wedding and get a free drink so they could save a little bit of money that night.

The formal ended up being fun. I had some drinks, danced with a random cop's girlfriend, ate some food, and then went to some after parties in a couple of the hotel rooms that people got for the night.

Another part of the fun was watching people "borrow" things from the hotel from and stash them in other people's room. I know it sounds childish, but when you have a group of people hopped up on pizza and alcohol, some stupid decisions will be made. An example of one of these decisions was trying 9 people in a Jeep Wrangler to go 3 blocks and pick up some pizza. Actually, that had to be one of the best decisions ever made because I was starving.

An Evening With Kevin Smith

On Saturday, Nov 7th, Jon and I went to the House of Blues in Dallas to hear and Q&A session with writer/director/actor/all-around bad ass Kevin Smith. He has been doing these sessions for the past couple of years now and he has always had a great turn out.

One thing that I love about his Q&A sessions is that nothing is off limits with him. No matter how graphic, stupid, or private a question maybe, he will do his best to answer it in great detail. Mr. Smith did say that the only question that he will never answer is how much he weighs. He had always stated that he has always been sensitive about that subject and lets the public know so much private things about him that he wants to keep that private so he can feel somewhat normal because not everyone will no everything about him.

He stated that he never has anything prepared to talk about with the exception of thanking people for coming to the show and a story about the last time that he was in Texas.

He did talk about a wide array of subjects. He talked about directing the "undirectable" Bruce Willis in his new movie called "A Couple of Dicks" with Tracy Morgan, why he named his daughter Harley Quinn, a character from a Batman Comic book.

At some points of the session, he would ask some of the audience questions just because he became interested in that person and wanted to know more about them. Another high point of the show was when some dumb ass kid actually paid Kevin Smith 50 bucks in order to sit on stage with him for the rest of the show. Kevin Smith took the guys money and just let the kid hang out for a little bit. When the show was over, Kevin gave back the guy's money and signed whatever the kid wanted.

The whole event lasted a little over 3 hours with no breaks at all. I was really surprised that he could talk to so much and be very candid with people with no fear of what the audience might think.

The House of Blues did set up to do a meet and greet with Kevin, but no one told Mr. Smith about. Since he was also running late due the Dallas Mavericks traffic, he said that if anyone wanted anything signed that they should just put stuff on the stage while he talked and he would sign it after the show. And for the people who were refunded their money for the meet and greet, he said that he would do group photos with those people.

Another cool thing about Mr Smith was how nice he was towards people. When someone asked him a question, 80% of the time he would talk directly to that person like they were having a private conversation.

It was a great time listening him talk about how he felt about George Carlin, his wife, everything else that anybody wanted to know. I just can't wait for the DVD to come out just so I can remember all the questions that he answered and what topics he talked about.

Halloween Parties: The Austin, TX Edition

I took the Friday before Halloween off from work in order to make the long and dangerous journey to Austin, TX. The reason for the adventure was for the Halloween party that was going to occur on Saturday night. A huge group of us were going, but everyone else was going on the day of Halloween while Jessica and I went the night before.

We meet up with Cody, Laura, Boj, and Matt and had a quick dinner at Kerby Lane and then hit up the night life Austin, TX style. And by Austin, TX style, I mean we went to a neighborhood karaoke bar called Homer's. After a few pitchers and some horrible singing, it was time to bring to party back to Cody and Laura's. We all stayed up way too late because we knew we had a full day ahead of us in order to set up the party.

When we woke up the next day, the girls decided to hang out and do some girl stuff while the guys decided start they day by getting an authentic Mexican breakfast, getting some dry ice and play a round of golf and have a couple of drinks. We probably golfed a little longer than we should have because the girls pretty much did all of the preparations for the party that we were supposed to do.

By the time we got done with golfing, we only had a couple of hours to get ready for the party and waited for the rest of the group to come over to Cody and Laura's house before we departed to Darby and Jenn's house, where party was going to be that night.

Around 7, everyone made it to Cody's house and we decided to head over to Darby's house a little before the party just to help set up the keg and sound system. We also had to put up pieces of dry ice in various places to give a spooky tone.

An hour later, people started to show up for the party. Darby has some really cool property that is perfect for throwing parties. Next to his house, Darby and his wife bought the lot next door. It is big enough for them to park and RV and a couple of boats if they wanted to do that.

On one end of the fenced in lot, was the sound system that was hooked up to a projector that was showing the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre. On the other end of the lot, was the drink station that was equipped with a keg and some punch was started out not being too strong but that change when Cody got a hold of it. Oh, and in the middle of the lot was a little bonfire that was going on the entire night.

Like I said in the previous paragraph, the punch was not that strong to begin with. We were at the party for about an hour and a half until Cody had the bright idea to add an entire bottle of everclear into the punch without telling anyone, especially his wife Laura.

By 10, Cody is completely hammered watching the movie by himself while giving his own commentary to the movie. A couple of hours later, it was time for us to go home because we were getting too tired and only had one dd at this point.

The group then went back to Cody and Laura's house since we were all staying there for the night. We woke up the next morning and went to BB Rover for what had to be the best breakfast that I have ever had. After that, it was watching some of the Cowboys game and making that 3 hour drive back to Arlington.

One thing that I did forget to mention was how everyone woke up on Sunday morning. I woke up on the couch wearing my costume along with someone's hoodie and sports coat on. Paul woke up in their computer room scared and alone because he had no idea where he was or his wife Katie, who happened to be in the next room asleep and not worrying about Paul at all. Cody fell asleep with his "Teen Wolf" make up on and got it all over his wife and bed. When he woke up, he looked like he had just got home from living in Tibet for seven 7 years and never being able to take a shower in that time. And no one knew where Matt slept, whenever one woke up, he just appeared out of nowhere with a dog.

The funny thing was that we had to look at each other's cameras to see what all occurred the night before. Overall, it was a great weekend though.

Halloween Parties: The Fort Worth Edition

It is Halloween time and everyone know what that means, the magical night where women dress slutty and drink too much and when fat dudes where bulky costumes to try and hide their bodies. Basically, anything can happen on Halloween, up is down, black is white, good is evil and evil becomes really good.

The Halloween festivities started the week before Halloween as usual. Kirk and Lisa Gail had their annual Halloween Bash at their home. This is always a good time because they go all out for this party. Everything in their house has some sort of spooky theme to it and if that didn't scare you, then the karaoke would have.

Kirk and Lisa Gail have a really cool house. Their backyard is part of a country club, so when it is dark, we usually sneak on to the golf course and play a couple of holes.

Before we went to the main party, we went for a little pre-party at Paul and Katie's house since they lived only a couple of minutes away from Kirk and Lisa Gail's house. Everyone, which was about 8 or 9 of us, got dressed there and had a couple of drinks. This also seems to be a tradition as well. It just seems fun to pre party with a small amount of friends before we wreck havoc at another party.

There were some creative costumes this year. Paul and Katie went as Peter and Lois Griffin from Family guy, Boj went as Bodie aka Patrick Swayze from Point Break, and I went as John McEnroe, just to name a few.

One thing that Kirk loves to have at his parties is tons of beer and drinks. This year, he decided to brew his own beer. It tasted pretty good and seemed to resemble a Shiner in taste and look.

I preferred to drink the punch that was made because it was full of grain alcohol and seemed to be doing its job very well.

After a couple of hours of just hanging out with everyone, they hosts of the party decided to do the best costume contest. I lost so I am now convinced that it was rigged and racist. Not really, I just felt bad about not being too creative at my costume this year.

After couple more hours and a couple of more rounds of drinks, it was time to close down Kirk and Lisa Gail's and head back to Paul and Katie's to resume our pre-party, which was now the post-party. It kind of seemed like an R. Kelly music video where all we did was we had a pre/main/post party, but I am proud to say that there was no peeing on any underage girls, that is where we draw the line of becoming like R. Kelly.

The next morning, a small group of us went to eat at a small restaurant called "Bacon's" for an early breakfast before the Cowboys game and the two bottles of champagne that awaited for us back at the house.

Stay tuned for party 2: The Austin, TX Edition