Wednesday, January 25, 2012

John Michael and Laura Betik Got Hitched

True love is hard to find, sometimes you think you have true love and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a goddamn magic show ready to double team your girlfriend...Luckly, I did not attend a wedding with this type of true love. I attended a Betik wedding.

"What is a Betik Wedding?" you may be asking. Well, it is one of the craziest Czech wedding ceremonies and receptions that I have attended.

John Michael Betik and Laura Driggers, who have met in the 5th grade, decided it was time to
get married in the scenic Dripping Springs, Texas (which is a little outside of Austin).

The non denominational wedding ceremony only lasted about 20 minutes and had one a guy who looked just like "Whitey" from Me, Myself, and Irene as a groomsman. His name was "Mad" Mike and he could throw down the F bomb like he was a poet. Now, I just met Mad Mike and heard him curse at least 10 times in a 3 minute time period while waiting for the guarder toss. He worked in profanity the way other artists might work in oils or clay. It was his true medium; a master.

The weather was perfect for an outdoor wedding in January. It was sunny and cool during the actually ceremony and stayed like that for the majority of the night, especially during the cocktail hour that immediately followed the nuptials.

The venue for this party was non other than the Vista Ridge Resort. It had a rustic feel to everything, which gave it that special John Micheal and Laura touch to it. A cool thing about it was that there weren't any fancy glasses to drink out of, just mason jars. And that was just one of many cool things at the wedding.

Many other things at the wedding was a photo booth, names cards with musicians on them in order to find your table, and the wedding march.

Now, the wedding march is one hell of a crazy thing to describe, so I will do the best that I can. Basically, the men and women stand side by side (the ladies are on the left, guys on the right). The walk, dance, or run down the aisle with each other and then split up at the end of the hall. We then meet up with our dates at the other end of the hall and hold hands high to form a tunnel. The entire group then goes through the tunnel and continues to form a non stop tunnel until the bride and groom go to the middle of the dance floor to be surrounded by everyone for their dance.

One thing that always throws me off about this dance, is what happens to the people who are forming the endless wall. I don't know who started this tradition, but when a guy goes through the man manned tunnel, he, apparently, has full authority to punch another guy straight in the balls. And by punch, I don't mean hit someone as hard as you can. You just give them a quick slap tap to the nuts. Girls are not untouchable in this tunnel of forced love. Every once in awhile, a girl will get her butt grabbed by a random non relative, and if you are a lucky 28 year old girl, your ass will grabbed by a frisky 12 year old boy.

The rest of the night went by without a snag. The mother/son dance, the father/daughter dance, the bouquet toss, the guarder toss, and the grand celebration came to an end with everyone having a blast. But the festivities didn't quite end there.

The after party at the hotel went on through out the night with everyone drinking and eating bbq from the wedding. I went to bed before everything finally came to a end for the night with everyone having a headache the next morning as a reminder of how much they partied the night before.

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