Pumping Iron: The Kevin Way

I guess hell froze over today because I joined a gym about a month ago and I have actually been going on a regular basis.

I joined the gym, the place I joined rhymes with LA Mitness, with a couple of friends and even developed a 5-day a week workout plan. Four days a week, I workout a specific area of my body and on the 5th day, it is a full body workout baby.

After every workout session, the group of us will play a couple of games of racquetball. I have becoming pretty decent at the game in two ways. I am learning how to play the game by the proper rules and how to think quickly about where the ball may go next.

The other way I am becoming ok at the game is constantly getting hit by the damn ball. So far I have been hit in the head, back, face, Achilles tendon, and stomach. If I received bonus points for the official blue racquetball hitting me, I am more than confident that I would be the World Champion of getting hit by that damn devil ball.

Since I joined the gym, one benefit I was entitled to was have 1 free sessions with a personal trainer. Big f'ing mistake.

I went to high school with the personal trainer named Jimmy and he seemed liked a douchbag. And guess what, I was right. Total douchbag. He told me that he played professional football for the Seattle Seahawkes and I found all of his stats here. Hope you didn't check out that link because there is nothing on it. Nothing at all.

Anyway, I ended up working out like crazy under his "supervision". I was completely drained the 3/4ths of the way through and barely finished

. At the end of the workout, he tried to sell my some more personal trainer sessions at an outrageous price. Once I said no, he did something that cracked me up. He started to talk to me like the two of us were on an undercover Mission in Guam and the only way to get out alive is the purchase of more sessions at an extremely low price. So low even that he would have to play dumb to his boss about how low the price was.

I ultimately said no but thanked him for his time. About a week later, a friend of mine had a sessions with him and pulled the exact same "Mission in Guam" speech to her as Jimmy did with me. This made me laugh a little more.

Anyway, I have been doing pretty good at this "working out" stuff and have even lost some weight and gained some muscles. For some reason, my friends think I have "retard strength" since I have been impressing everyone with my ability to lift a bar of weights over my and repeat that motion 10 times in a row.

I will give an update of my progress in a couple of weeks to let everyone know how awesome I am doing.